自足就好

This is going to sound very contradictory to what I'd posted last night.

I just realised (took me long enough) that to even go meet B for a meal, to see him for just an hour is fulfilling enough. And there I was complaining about him smoking, I wasn't bothered by it today. Maybe seeing him, enjoying his company is far more important than other issues.

This relationship is definitely different. Indeed, it is more difficult to maintain, I'm still bothered by what is he doing with his phone, but I guess this feeling will pass with time. I do hope that he will not keep anything from me. For me, it is just this blog of mine. I'd made a bad move of telling Mr Tan about it and I'd to be really careful of what I post. This blog, is supposed to contain some of my inner thoughts. So this is the only secret I'm not letting him see. Maybe, I'll tell him later but not now. Maybe when we are more or less settled.

I'm a believer of fate. I believe that it's fate that brought us together. To let us meet. Mr Tan once made the bet, that he'll treat me if there's no guys courting me or show any interest in me in 3 months time. Indeed there isn't any until later.

I believe things happen for a reason. For what had happened to him, to me. If it did not, we won't have meet. I nearly was going to be transfer to another place, however I wasn't. If I'm to be transfer out, I won't have know B more, won't be talking to him, won't be seeing him, won't be with him. I told B that most prolly we are fated to meet. Why would I not meet him earlier or later? If it's earlier, we may not last this long. If later, we may have meet someone else.

Maybe I'd learnt from my past relationships. Maybe I'd indeed grow up. I'm different now. I think more in this relationship. Putting in efforts to make it work.

It's funny how I always will have something to think about whenever I was in the shower and my mind was blank this morning. Nothing came to my mind at all. Like I was back in peace again. And just earlier when I was in the shower, again, blank.

I hope we would have solve our differences by end of this year. :)