Just can't sleep

Here I am, unable to sleep with all the questions running through my mind. Maybe I'm just too affected by what she had mentioned in her blog post.

I asked him about why is he reading her blog and checking out X's blog and instagram? He looked confused initially. Then again, I'm not sure whether was he genuinely confused or just pretending to be. When he finally remember, he just said he did it out of curiosity. It meant nothing and by all means, I can do the same - checking out my ex bfs blogs or whatever.

Am I over reacting?

How do I know what had happened to her will not happen to me?

How do I know he wasn't messaging any of his ex gfs? Even if he claim not to be, how would I know if he's telling the truth?

How do I know he isn't liking someone right now while he's with me? Hell, he can even be fb messaging the ex whom he loved very much and still sleep with his then gf no?

How do I even know what's on his mind? How do I know when is he telling the truth? How do I know if he love only me? Only he, himself knows.

It is yet another long night and tomorrow, another long day. Guess I won't know the answers to the above questions unless I 'mind enter' him right?

It is so hard for me to trust him now. I don't want to be checking on his messages and all. He will be deleting them anyway.

I just can't brush it off my mind. When he hugged me to sleep, when he said he love me,... Everything he said or do, made me think.